Friday, November 16, 2012

A Letter of Love (II)




I’m so shy to tell you this, that I’m so in love with you. 

I’ll not ask for anything else but for this one thing. Remember, this is not just a quote. 

I never believed in love at first sight, never believed until I saw you that night. 

I asked a friend what love is, he told me it’s when you can’t stop thinking of him and when the thought of him makes you smile. When I met you, I told myself, “This must be it.”

An angel asked me a while ago to give him one good reason why I love you so much. I smiled and said, “Because there’s no reason not to.” I wish I could be with you every night, watch you fall asleep and kiss you goodnight. When I get to heaven, I know just what to do. I’ll spend eternity watching over you.

I asked God why life’s like this. He gave me no answer. I asked why I’m still here. Again, He gave me no answer. I asked why I met you. He smiled and said, “So there’d be a reason for everything else.”

Need I say I care when you see I really do? 
Need I say I love you when life to me is you? 
Need I say I need you when I mean everything I do? 
Need I say the words? Just tell me and I’d say them all for you. 

I choose to love you in silence for in silence I find no rejection. 
I choose to love you in loneliness for in loneliness no one owns you but me. 
I choose to adore you from a distance for distance will shield me from pain. 
I choose to kiss you in the wind for the wind is gentler than my lips. 
I choose to hold you in my dreams for in my dreams, you have no end.

When I say I love you, please believe it’s true. 
When I say forever, know I’ll never leave you. 
When I say goodbye, promise me you won’t cry. Cause the day I’ll be saying that would be the day I die.

You are the reason why even at the saddest part of my life, I smile. 
Even at confusion, I understand. 
Even in betrayal, I trust. 
Even in fear of pain, I love. 
And If you don’t want to believe me, look in front of a mirror and there, you’ll see my dear how much i love you. 

I miss you when there’s no reason to, how much more if there was? 
I miss you when we talk, how much more if we don’t? 
I miss you after we’re together, how much more if I see you never? I love you now, how much more later? 

Each time I miss you, a star falls down from the sky. So if you look up and find it dark, it is all your fault. 
You made me miss you too much! And I miss you not because you miss me but because you taught me how to feel the emptiness when you’re not here. 
I love you not because you love me but because you taught me everything I never knew existed before.

If there will be a time you think you miss me, don’t think about it. Instead, try to feel it with your heart. You’ll find out that you don’t miss me at all. Cause you’ll know better, that I never left you. 

If someone would ask me what a beautiful life means, I would lean my head on your shoulder, hold you close to me and answer with a smile, “Like this.”

Walking under the rain feels so lonely and cold. But if you were there beside me to share the warmth of your love then I would want to stay under the rain for the rest of my life. 

I have searched in places, 
I’ve waited for years, 
I’ve taken all the chances, 
I’ve cried so many tears, 
I’ve seen so many faces, 
I’ve hid a lot of fears until my heart stopped searching cause you’re already here. 
I’d rather be blind than not see you. I’d rather be deaf than not hear from you. 
I’d rather lose my voice than not say this to you, that I’d rather lose my heart than not love you.

If you hide, I’ll seek for you. 
If you’re lost, I’ll search for you. 
If you leave, I’ll wait for you. 
If they try to take you away from me, I’ll fight for you. Cause I never want to lose someone I love. 

Why do I text you? It’s my choice. It’s my way of saying I remember you. 
Why do I remember you? It’s my choice. It proves that I care. 
Why do I care? I don’t know. It’s not my choice but my heart’s. 

you said, "Someday, I’m gonna hurt you with what I might say and I can hurt you all over again." and I said that, When you leave, remember the place where you left me cause I’ll still be there waiting for you. But if you go back and I’m no longer there, it means that I love you too much so I went to search for you. 

But, if you are still leaving me, Take me with you. If you’re running away, take me too. If you’re jumping off, hold my hand as you do. I love life but it’s worth losing if I lose it with you. 

I may not always know if you're hurt, I may not always know if you're sad, I may not always know if you're confused but one thing I hope you know, I'm here whenever you need me. 

And I’ll take your hand, wipe away your tears, take you for a walk and remind you how special you are. And I’m not asking you to stay for the rest of my life, stay as long as you want. No why’s, no how’s, no but’s, no promises. Just stay. It’s more than enough. 

I’ve honestly tried to let you go, 
I’ve honestly tried to forget you, 
I’ve honestly tried not to think of you but I honestly can’t cause I honestly don’t want to. 

I don’t want to put on my mind that someday, I’d have to see you walking away from me. But before it happens, I just want to clarify something. You may go. But I’ve got no reason not to follow. 

I know your life can go on without me, that you can be happy without me, that you can survive without me. But even if you turn me away, I will still choose to stay with you and be your sweetest stranger forever. 

I don’t know why I keep on loving you despite the fact that I’ll get hurt again just like before. I never learn cause I don’t want to. Not now when I’m still strong to fall for you over and over again. Cause, There’s a love that only you can give, a smile that only your lips can show, a twinkle that can only be seen in your eyes and my life that only you can complete.

One day, we might forget the people that once came to our lives. But I know that when that day comes, I won’t forget you. Cause you didn’t just come into my life, you became a part of it.

Everytime you cry a tear, my heart cries along. But you’ll never know cause I wouldn’t tell. Everytime you’re hurt, I’m hurt too. Cause that’s what love is for and I love you. I promise to be there when you need me, I promise to hug you tight when you’re lonely, I promise to wipe your tears when they fall and I promise to keep you, not for the rest of my life but for the rest of yours.

I love you but you make me cry, you hurt me and make me feel stupid. But you know why I hold on? Cause I know I’ll be crying harder, get hurt even more and feel dumber if I ever let you go. Sometimes I think of how much you hurt me and I wish I could hurt you back. But then I realized I'd just be hurting worse if I hurt you like that. 

I’m holding on to the thought that you’re not mine. I’m going to look you in the eye, smile and say, “You’re not mine.” Then I’ll walk away, turn around at the last moment and say, “But I wish you were.” I wish you were with me so I can tell you directly how much you mean to me. I’ll hold you tight and hug you near my heart so that you can hear what it’s trying to whisper, “You’re the reason why I’m beating.” 

Sorry if I may not show you love the way you know it, I may not love you the way it should be but I tell you, right now, I'm loving you the best way I know how. 

If I can just make everything fall where it should be, I would. If I could make life better for you, I would. But I can’t. All I can do is to let you know that mine has been better because of you. 

If you could be a part of my body, I’ll let you be my heart. For I want you to be the one who beats, be the center of all my emotions and be the last one to stop when I’m gone.

If people would ask me if you’re good, I’d say you’re not. If they would ask me if you’re better, I’d say you’re not. The reason? Cause why would I say you’re good or better when you’re the best I’ve ever had?

If kisses were stars, I’d give you the sky. If touches were tears, I would cry. If love was water, I’d give you the sea. And be with you for all eternity. 

If I had wings, I’d fly where you are. If I could control distance, you’d never be far. If I had a way, I’d be with you right now. Cause I can’t live my life the way it should be when you’re far away from me. 

It’s hard to find words to tell you how much you mean to me. A lot of times, I don’t say anything at all. But I hope someday, you’ll understand, having you is what I live for. I never intended to be the most important person in your life, that’s just too much to ask. But I do hope that I’d cross your mind and you’d smile thinking that I touched your life in a special way. I may not be your girl but one thing’s for sure, that when I find someone like you, I’ll marry him. 


with love,

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